Just ordered p90x. Gonna start that bad boy hopefully next week if it comes in by then.

Wedding website is ALMOST done. Just waiting on Kee to finish up his bio...although I already started it for him so I don't know what's so hard about finishing it. There will be two unfinished sections...hotel info and the gift registry. We will hopefully start registering next month, and I still have to figure out which area hotels have the best rates that I can reserve a block of rooms for.

I loved working on the website. Web design was something that I used to do in my high school days. It was a lot of work. The reason I chose to not go with those wedding websites that you can just fill the info was because honestly I didn't like the designs. And I'm a control freak and I like things exactly the way I want them. So hey! I came up with the brilliant idea of buying webspace and a domain name, making my own graphics, and building my own site. Can't wait for you guys to see it! Soon I hope!

I've been off for the past 5 nights. Tonight is my last, then 3 on. I have been a big ball of lazy. Although I've done a lot of cooking, so I guess I can say I've been productive!

The other night I had my first post-op open-heart surgery patient...and just my luck he's on an Intra-Aortic Balloon Pump. He had poor left ventricular function. The IABP basically rests his heart and augments pumping by inflating when the ventricle relaxes to allow more blood in then quickly deflating right before the ventricle closes to increase pressure to push blood out. This decreases the SVR (afterload) and increases Coronary Artery perfusion to perfuse the myocardium. Ha. I THINK I got that right.

So the night I have this guy I'm orienting to the IABP...thank goodness I wasn't on my own. His pressures were labile, SBP 80-90s, MAPS 65-70. He was on 4 pressors: Dopamine, Phenylephrine, Epi, and Vasopressin. LOVE IT. Plus he has a HUGE drug history, so he was on high amounts of Fentanyl & Versed. The usually stern & scary Cardiothoracic Surgery Attending was unusually pleasant and humorous.

See his tattoos? Count how many he has, multiply that number by 10 and THAT is how much Fentanyl he should be on. I definitely was less nervous after that encounter...usually I want to pee my pants when I see him walking my way. HA.

Orienting for 12 hours went okay. Then I get the "Ok. You're going to have him all by yourself when you come back tonight. Good luck."

Okay.

So that was last night. Thank goodness he was a little bit more stable. Neo, Dopa, & Vasopressin were titrated down. By the end of my shift I was able to wean Neo to off and Vasopressin to a very miniscule dose. I even weaned his sedation to minimal doses without this guy freaking out on me.

I feel like a big grown up ICU nurse now that I'm able to take the post-op hearts on my own. Yay me. =)

Just got a call from my realtor. The sellers accepted our offer of $310,000 for the short sale! So now she is submitting the offer to the lender for approval. This is going to be the longest part...but hopefully not toooo long! I'll keep you updated! Eeeek!

Just wanted to say that I loved loved loved seeing Mary the other day and having breakfast with her, Car, and Amber. Lovely ladies! =)

Kee and I put an offer on a house yesterday! It's a short sale going for $288K. We put an initial offer of $290K and then our back will be $310K. It's a 2006 4 bedroom, 2.5 bath, 2501 sqft home with granite and tile througout. And it's across the park and near the wildlife area...so I pictured the area perfect for tons of running and training for runs!

The backyard is kind of smaller than what we wanted and it's not done yet, but that's okay. We went to Home Depot yesterday to look at landscaping ideas and to get paint swatches as well!

This is a MUCH better deal than the house we were originally trying to buy last summer. So we'll see what happens. So exciting all the things going on right now. 2010 is off to a great start!

October 23, 2010 @ Poppy Ridge Golf Course in Livermore. Tweeking the wedding website a bit right now and ordering my STDs. (ha that cracks me up) and looking for a DJ and photographer.

Seriously, Kee and I were talking...there's waaaay more stuff we have to do this time around with this venue, but it's much more fun this time around, too. :)

And I'm sick again. Boo.

A couple of you know what I have been going through these past couple of months. It wasn't easy. It was full of confusion, drama, stupidity, fun...you name it. But it was something that needed to happen. I realized what I have and what I want.

A while back ago Kee and I pushed back the wedding. At that point it was decided that we weren't going to get married in May and we, no, I, wasn't trying to talk about setting another date. I felt a like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders once that was decided. He was hurt and we barely talked or saw each other. And of course there were other things going on too, things that Mary & Caroline know about.

So after I finally got my head out of my ass...I realized that I missed Kee. I missed what we had. I realized that I had a wonderful person who loved me for me and actually put up with my crap. That's huge. And, even though I get annoyed with little things...I never got sick of him after 9 years. I realized I didn't want to be with anyone else but him and how good I actually had it.

So a couple of weeks ago I told him all this. And all he did was smile. And I swear I saw saw tears although he may deny it. I told him I want to marry him. He slid that ring back on my left hand and asked "will you marry me again and spend the rest of your life with me?" and of course I said "yes...I do." :)

And here I am now. Re-thinking of all things wedding, making it about him and me b/c I lost sight of that through the first time around. Today we are going to look at a venue in Livermore nestled in the wineries. We are both in love with this venue and are thinking if we book it, our new wedding date will be Saturday, October 23, 2010. It will be the fall wedding that I wanted with the colors I wanted. It will be the type of venue he wanted. So we will see.

I just want to thank my sister and Mary for being so supportive and being the awesome MOH/BM that you are. Never once did you judge me and you let me follow my heart and supported me the entire way. Love you.

And Caroline...Congrats to you and Chris on your engagement. I am thrilled for you. And now I feel bad for giving him a hard time everytime I have gone over there. I think it would be fun to go through the wedding planning process with you. And I have a question to ask you when I see you next. :)

That's it folks.

UMMM...hi can Caroline and Mary please update?! KGREATTHANKS.

The other night I had my first code on my own. I had one patient. I'm not trying to be dramatic, but I had a feeling that something was going to happen that night. He was cruising along just fine. Pressures were fine, off pressors. Breathing was pretty good, satting 92-95% on 6L NC. Neutropenic guy. He was in pain on PCA Dilaudid, but said that his pain was the most tolerable that it had been in days...2-3/10 abdominal pain. He was fine. But for some reason I just had a feeling of impending doom.

Around 130a he started c/o SOB and that he felt he wasn't getting enough oxygen. To make a long story short, I called RT and the MD to the bedside, put on a SFM, then a 100% non-rebreather, then we tried him on Bipap b/c he has a hx of OSA. He was satting okay, but he was so cold and had poor peripheral perfusion, so getting an accurate reading was difficult. Then he started turning pale, perfusely diaphoretic, and had decreased mental status. It was decided then that we were going to intubate after his ABG came back with a pH of 6.998. The code was called and he was rapidly intubated. So when I left him he was on 4 pressors: Dopamine, Levophed, Neosynephrine, and Vasopressin. I literally was busy with that guy from 2am til I left giving fluids, titrating gtts, and drawing labs.

So yes. I survived my first code on my own!